M25 at night

So im writin this entry on my phone whilst sittin in jamies car goin down the M25, so i apologise for any text speak that might get thru! Oops there we go, the first of many!!
Anyway, been my day off today so after spendin the mornin at abbi’s and a convo with sammie on msn, it was decided that we were to go to london to pick up sammie, matt and jake! As we departed and shoutin random insults to ppl in walton such like “get a proper bike”, “nice hair” and “your lost”! The last one bein quite funny cuz it was a woman sittin there studyin a map and upon shoutin “your lost” causin her to jump up out of her skin and sayin something which i didn’t quite catch as we went round the corner on 2 wheels! Haha anyway this is jamie’s first proper drive since passin his test, gettin the car, taxin and insurin it (no jamie, drivin the car up and down the driveway doesn’t count as a proper drive!) so the journey been pretty clear cept the 7 miles of roadworks on  the M25 with those bloody ‘average’ speed cameras which im sure some ppl don’t get the meanin of as they slam their feet on the brakes everytime they see a camera, then speed up after, well done twats, expect to see a letter on your door mat in a couple of weeks! Hey i wonder if that letter explains the meanin of average for them! That aside we got to london in bout hour n half and after playin “spot the white person” in london, jamie demonstrated what a pavement should be used for, parkin your car whilst doin 30mph! Quite a feat mate, well done! So we got jake, sammie and matt we went for a long ride…  around the corner to see emma! Aint seen her in ages! After learnin she’s been ‘ill’ and we put our face marks and gloves on (yes im jokin for the more serious ppl out there) we sat on the driveway chillin 4 a bit discovered jamie had a permant marker on him, see attached pictures, and we attacked ppl with it, no further explanation required!

Emma *Sharpied*

More Sharpie Expolits!

Emma Liked this one!

"Handy"

So anyway time tickin on we stopped off in harrow for kebab and macdonalds we decided to head off, and here we are now, in the car, now on the A12 bangin out the tunes, after much debate what tuneage should be played! All in all its been an ok day, ill take this chance to say well done j on ya first proper drive, its been good.

Few more pics of the day…

Sammie!

Me and Sammie

Me and Jake

Im missing "U"

Company: (pre-recorded message) Hello this is *************, are you struggling to pay off your debts. Using government legislation we know how to help blah blah blahblahblah… press 5 to hear more

Me: *presses 5*

Company: Hello this is **** from **** how can i help

Me: I like traffic lights! do you like traffic lights?

Company: (confused woman) do i like traffic lights?

Me: yes traffic lights, i like them do you?

Company: traffic lights? no i dont like traffic lights

Me: oh ok then, byeeee

the moral of this, if ya wanna phone me up and waste my time, i shall sit here and waste yours! the fact they were cold calling a shop anyway shows how much of a numpty business they are! If we were in debt we wouldnt be dealing with them would we! like durrr!

anyway just thought id share that with you! kept me and vonny amused 4 ages! lol

I should really get on with a couple of bits instead of sitting here chatting and blogging but this chair is soo comfy.. well its not but its better than moving! hehe yeah ok so im feeling lazy today! question for ya all tho, anyone know when the clacton carnival is?? Im hiring out some equipment to one of the floats but need to confirm the date, and going all the way upstairs to my laptop requires far too much effort! reply?!

I’m afraid not, sir,’ the clerk told him apologetically, ‘but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that should serve your purposes.’

Skeptical but intrigued, the salesman located the machine,inserted $15.00, and stuck his head into the opening, at which time the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later the salesman pulled out his head and surveyed is reflection, which showed the best
haircut of his life.

Two feet away was another machine with a sign that read,’Manicures, $20.00.’

‘Why not?’ thought the salesman. He paid the money, inserted his hands into the slot, and the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later he pulled out his hands and they were perfectly manicured.

The next machine had a sign that read, ‘This machine provides a service men need when away from their wives, 50 Cents.’

The salesman looked both ways, put fifty cents in the machine, unzipped his fly, and with some anticipation, stuck
his manhood into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of agony and almost passed
out. Fifteen seconds later it shut off. With trembling hands, the salesman was able to withdraw his tender unit…Which now had a button sewn on the end of it.

The little girl said, ‘She ran out of petrol about halfway round the block, so another dog is pushing her home.’